


Irresistible Desire (to be irresistibly desired)

by orphan_account



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe-Non Magic, Editor!Remus, Falling In Love, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Remus/Past OC, Single dad Remus, aftermath of break-up, baker!Sirius
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-09
Updated: 2015-12-09
Packaged: 2018-05-05 18:57:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5386796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As if dealing with a split from a 10 year relationship wasn't bad enough, Remus Lupin must also deal with losing his son for the holidays to his ex.  Feeling depressed and low, he wanders into a cafe where a surprisingly understanding baker offers to take him out for drinks--and maybe something more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Irresistible Desire (to be irresistibly desired)

**Author's Note:**

> So this is basically me venting my feelings and it's a gross self-insert of my life (except that I have no sexy baker!Sirius to make me feel better lol) but it's always the holidays that makes you feel shitty about your relationships (or in my case, horrid relationship failures). I'm sorry if this fic is super dull and total shit. I've been stuck at work for over ten hours so I'm making myself feel better with some wolfstar. (they get a much more happy ending than I do lol)
> 
> Still working on the Loved In Spite of Ourselves chapter. I'm about half finished now, so it should be sorted soon. And I have a new Harry/Cedric fic almost ready for posting, and a handful of other wolfstar, and wolfstarbucks prompts. My askbox is still open for prompts, even if it's taking me weeks and weeks to get to them. My work is super busy right now so it may take me ages. But I'll work through them all eventually x
> 
> Title borrowed from Robert Frost.

Feeling overly frustrated and angry—he told himself it was irrational but was it, really—Remus walked to the new café he’d been frequenting for a while, and wrenched the door open. His face was set in a glare, he could feel it in the small ache between his brows caused by the deep frown, and he felt bad because the people who ran the café had been so bloody nice to him and they didn’t deserve his shit mood. But he couldn’t help it.

After a long, arduous row with his ex—which seemed to have gone on since mid-July when they decided to make the split official—he’d given in. He would be letting Teddy head over to Edinburgh for the holidays in spite of his ex refusing to participate in any of the parenting since Remus and Gil had split. Gil reasoned that because he wasn’t Teddy’s actual, _real_ parent, in spite of being present in Teddy’s life for nearly a decade, he didn’t have to do any of the difficult stuff. Except now he was demanding Teddy for the entirety of Hanukkah meaning Remus would be spending the holiday away from his family since he couldn’t get the time off work, and now he’d be away from his son as well because apparently Gil was happy to pull upon his role as second parent when it was fun and convenient.

He could shower Teddy in lavish presents and attention for a week, then send him back for Remus to deal with the teenage angst and frustration of having left their home in Scotland, of Remus’ new job, Teddy’s new school, and having to start over with all new friends. 

Yes. It was _so_ bloody fair.

Swiping his hand across his brow, Remus approached the counter and saw the baker stood behind the pastry counter loading up a fresh tray of fruit tarts. Remus had got to know James and Lily, the owners, and he’d got a casual hello once or twice from the baker, but that was it.

Which was a shame, mostly because the baker was dead gorgeous. As in, one of the most criminally attractive people Remus had ever seen in his life and he wondered how the man was in a café instead of films or modelling. But what did he know about this bloke anyway, really?

He stood up straight though, and smiled when Remus approached. Leaning his forearms on the counter, he clasped his hands. “Hey there Professor Man.”

Remus blinked. “What?”

Sirius gave his head a sharp nod. “You’re always all Professor-y. Suit and all that.”

Remus looked down, then flushed. “Ah er. Funny thing, I used to teach, but I got a better offer. Now I’m an editor.”

“Like for a paper or books or…?”

“Novels,” Remus said. “Small publishing house. Just transferred to London.”

“Explains the accent,” Sirius said with a wide grin. “So you just come in to say hi or…?”

Remus blinked in surprise, then shook his head. “Ah er. No, I was hoping to order something.” When Sirius looked at him expectantly, Remus coughed. “Tea? And…something. Lily usually recommends me something.”

Sirius brightened. “Does she? Well I’d have to say the orange scones are particularly delicious today.”

“Yes I erm. That sounds lovely.” He fished his card out and handed it over as Sirius attempted to work the till, but eventually got frustrated. 

“How about we call it a gift, yeah? Because I bloody told them I didn’t know how to work this fucking thing. I bake, not…” He waved his hand impatiently at the till, giving it a proper grimace. “Not this.”

Remus pursed his lips. “Oh well. I mean, I could come back if you like?”

“No. You’re in here enough. I’d say you’ve earned a complimentary tea and scone. Besides I made them especially good today, so someone ought to benefit.”

Sirius hurried to fetch the tea, then selected the nicest looking scone from the pastry window, and shoved it onto a plate. “Sorted,” he said with a grin.

“Ta erm…” he then realised he didn’t know the man’s name.

The man looked confused for only a second. “Oh. I’m Sirius.” When Remus looked confused, he barked a laugh. “That’s my name. Like the star.”

Remus’ eyes widened, and his irritation was momentarily forgotten. “That’s interesting. Good interesting,” he clarified when Sirius frowned.

The baker brightened. “Thanks.”

But it didn’t take long for the weight of his situation to come crashing back down, so Remus took his complimentary wares to a table near the window and sat. Being that he was the only customer currently in the café, he felt less bad about sulking to himself as he tore off the corner of the scone and took a bite.

He was still frustrated, but Sirius hadn’t been wrong. It was the best bloody scone he’d had in possibly ever. The perfect amount of flaky and crumbly, and the orange was so refreshing, it almost startled him. With a small sigh, he sipped his tea and stared down at the marbled top of the table.

His head was spinning with everything crashing down. He and Gil had been on the outs for some time before the official split, so it hadn’t exactly been a surprise. But for whatever reason, to come home and hear, “It’s just not working, and the truth is, I don’t love you anymore,” had been a huge blow.

He had cried, privately to himself, for a while. Eventually he confronted his would-be ex after Teddy had been put to bed, and demanded to know how long he’d been feeling that way.

“Did this just occur to you?” he asked, rubbing his hand down his face.

Gil, who was dressed like he was going out, shrugged. “Not exactly, but Remus, you can’t say you don’t feel the same. I mean, we’ve been drifting apart for some time.”

Remus couldn’t deny that, really. But to hear it so plainly. “How long?”

Gil looked guilty this time, and he stared at the wall. “Honesty, about a year. But I was seriously thinking about it maybe six months now?”

“And you’re just telling me now?”

“Be reasonable,” he said, shaking his head. “I mean, I had to sort out my feelings as well.”

Remus could give him that. “Alright. Well…”

“I’ve met someone,” and really, that was what sent Remus over the edge. Gil hadn’t been sorting out his feelings at all. He’d been looking for someone else. If Remus had been smarter, he would have seen that coming. He’d been the other man in Gil’s life nine and a half years prior.

Remus couldn’t bring himself to get angry, he hadn’t the energy for it. Instead he hung his head, put his hands over his face and said, “Alright. What shall I tell our son?”

“Yours,” Gil corrected, something he hadn’t done in years, but it told Remus all he needed to know.

So he rang up an old school mate, Peter Pettigrew, who had been trying to convince him to give up teaching and go into the literary field for a while. Peter had just landed a position with Hogwarts Publishing and had twice now sent Remus job offers.

Within a month he and Teddy were packed and heading to London. They had a small flat in Southgate, which wasn’t too many stops from Remus’ new office. He settled into the post relatively quickly—though it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be—and in spite of Teddy’s constant irritation with his new school and his dad’s sudden and morose attitude, it was alright.

Until Gil started this rubbish, of course. And what was _wrong_ with him that he couldn’t tell Gil no? Well he knew the answer. Teddy wanted to go, and Remus just couldn’t bring himself to tell his son he couldn’t. Gil was just as much of a father as Remus had been over the years.

“Mate, are you alright?”

Remus looked up, mildly startled by the presence of Sirius now hovering near the empty chair at the table. 

“Has someone died?”

Remus chanced a very small, tense smile. “No. No untimely deaths. Or timely, for that matter. Just…a bit of personal shite.”

Sirius eyed the chair, then abandoning all propriety and pretence, sat himself down. “Well I’m bored—all my baking’s done, and you can see we’re not exactly overrun with customers. So I can play therapist if you like. Or friendly bartender.” He pretended to flick a lighter at Remus’ face. “Rough day?”

Rolling his eyes, Remus couldn’t help his small chuckle. He mimed lighting a fag, just for the sake of feeling whimsical, if only for a moment. “You could say that. My ex is a twat.”

Sirius sat back a little, crossing his arms. “Aren’t they all?”

“Reckon so. I guess in his eyes I’m probably just as much of a twat.” With a sigh, he realised he’d just outed himself to this perfect stranger who—for all his slightly flamboyant personality—could very well be a religious bigot. Remus looked at him with caution, but Sirius only looked sympathetic.

“How long has it been?”

“Since the split?” Remus sipped his tea as he counted the months. “Well, I left five months ago, but we had the dreadful talk two months before that. Had to sort out the sale of the house—he moved in with his new bloke and I got a job here. He’s up in Edinburgh now.”

Sirius blinked at him. “That far? And he’s still giving you problems.”

“We’ve a son together,” Remus said, deciding he might as well just be honest about the whole damned thing because really, who was Sirius anyway. As he’d stated himself, he was just bored. “Well, sort of. I mean, he’s mine, but my ex came round when he was five so…” Remus trailed off. “Don’t entirely know why I’m telling you all this.”

“Relax,” Sirius said, splaying his hands across the table. “I asked. If it makes you feel better, I can share something about myself.”

Remus shrugged. “Alright, go on.”

Sirius grinned widely. “Well I’ve a couple of ex’s, but nothing very serious as shared parenting. Last one was a bloke from Jamie’s rugby team and it ended…” Sirius trailed off. “Well never mind. Erm, I used to be extremely rich, but my parents detested the fact that I was very gay and very not interested in going into the family business. They loved me even less when my replacement…”

Remus quirked an eyebrow. “Replacement?”

“Baby brother,” Sirius clarified with a slight laugh. “When he realised they were twats and decided to go become a sushi chef. He’s currently living in Australia.”

“…a sushi chef in Australia?” Remus mused. “That’s erm…”

“We’re not even Japanese,” Sirius said with a small laugh. “But my brother’s a twit. Anyway I was disinherited, it was even in the papers though if you were living in…well…wherever…”

“Wales,” Remus supplied.

“Right yes. So you wouldn’t have heard. But it was all very fun all my year mates taking the piss for absolutely sodding ever.” Sirius sat back, running his hands through his long hair. “So that’s my great sob story. Jamie’s family took me in though, so I don’t have much to complain about. They were really great.”

Remus smiled a little. “He seems great. He and Lily. Which…where are they? I’m surprised they’ve left you on your own with your inability to work a till.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “I resent that, just so you know. And my godson was poorly. Had a huge fever so they had to take him in. James will be by after, but Lily was doing the usual mum panic.”

“Ah,” Remus said. “I know it well.”

Sirius’ grin widened. “So, do you feel better at all having chatted to me about all this?”

“Well no,” Remus said, and found Sirius’ deflated look a bit endearing. “Sorry, it’s just…my ex decided he didn’t want any of the parenting duties. No shared custody, no helping out financially even though he’s more well off than I am. Which…which fine, I can make it work. But now he’s decided he should be entitled to holidays and birthdays. And Hanukkah is next week, and Teddy will be off to Edinburgh for the entire thing.”

Sirius’ eyes widened. “You’re shitting me? After refusing to help he gets holidays?”

“Teddy wants to go,” Remus said miserably, letting the ache sink in, because whilst he knew it wasn’t rejection, and whilst he knew logically Teddy would love Gil, it still hurt. “I couldn’t say no. He’s old enough to decide.”

“And how old’s that?” Sirius demanded.

“Nearly fifteen.”

Sirius sank back into his chair. “Ah. Well, I suppose so, yeah.”

“He’s not very pleased with me about the move, and I think if he’d had the option he would have gone with Gil.”

After a second, Sirius reached over and put his hand atop Remus’, squeezing it gently. “Parenting is shite, mate. It truly is.”

Remus felt a warmth crawling up his arm, and was profoundly aware that this perfect stranger was _touching_ him. And sure it was comfort and it was nothing more than a human gesture but…

“Do you drink?”

Remus was ripped from his thoughts. “Er. As much as that sounds like the best idea considering my frustrations, I don’t think a mid-afternoon, Wednesday piss-up is appropriate for you know, adulting and all that.”

Sirius snorted a laugh, squeezing Remus’ hand once more before letting it go. He felt the loss profoundly, but also felt himself getting stuck in Sirius’ stormy-grey eyes. “That’s not what I’m suggesting. When does your kid leave for the twat’s place?”

Remus’ lips ached from trying to hide his grin. “Er, this weekend.”

“So let me take you out, then. Unless it’s hugely sacrilegious to get pissed on your holy day.”

“Ah I’m more of the Jewish by habit and birth, not by religious ideologies. So…” Then he stopped because Sirius was asking to take him out? Like a date? Or pity, perhaps. He felt his stomach clench unpleasantly at the latter. “It’s really nice of you but…”

“Oh no, don’t give me the but, Remus. I thought we were getting on.” Sirius’ pout was profoundly adorable and Remus hated being moved by it. But he did have to wonder why someone who looked like Sirius, someone so incredibly handsome it had to hurt, would be interested in him at all. Even for friendship. “Was I getting the wrong vibe?”

“No,” Remus blurted, clutching his hands round his tea. “I mean, no I…well obviously you know you’re very good looking. I just wasn’t sure…I mean, I’m me and…”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Sirius asked with a small frown. “You’ve seen yourself, right?”

“Yes,” Remus said slowly.

“So obviously you know I’d be mad not to be interested.” 

Licking his lips, Remus couldn’t be sure if Sirius was having him on, but he decided what the hell. Why not? Because even if it turned into some pity one-off at least it was something. “You know what, I think that sounds good.”

Sirius brightened so much, Remus was surprised by it. “Really? Excellent. Alright let me go write down my number, yeah? And we can text and…” He trailed off as he all-but skipped to the back room, returning a moment later with the bakery’s business card, his mobile number scratched across the back. “Honestly text me whenever. If you get bored or…anything. Alright?”

Remus put the number into his mobile, then smiled a bit. “Yeah, I will. And erm…thanks? See you soon, I suppose?”

It was his cue to go. As it was, he was returning late, but it didn’t matter. He had a date with a gorgeous baker and it didn’t feel much better than that.

*** 

He spent the week sending occasional text to Sirius who he learnt was very funny, a bit over-enthusiastic at times, and prone to sending messages at very odd hours—especially since as a baker he had to be in the shop at three in the morning to start his prep. But Remus was enjoying himself. Even Peter noticed that week.

“You actually look like you can get through the week without strangling someone. Even after getting that werewolf book I couldn’t sort out.”

Remus shuddered at the thought of the book, and of the author who absolutely refused to accept any of the editor’s required changes—bringing her contract to a total stand-still. Remus had spent at least three hours of his week being shouted at over skype with the fussy American who claimed, “You just don’t understand my creative process. It will make sense in the end, you know! There’s a reason he doesn’t know he’s a werewolf for six months.”

Remus attempted to counter her. “You do realise that in the six months he’s a werewolf, there are full moons. Which means he’ll transform. He might not remember them, but he’s going to bloody-well notice when he wakes up surrounded by dead animal parts. And at some point he might put two and two together—the wolf bite, the black outs round the full moon. And not to sound crass, but I’ve read to the end of your book as that is my job and I can tell you it doesn’t make sense. It truly doesn’t.”

“Well I’m not changing it,” she said.

“And I refuse to send it through for final approval until you do.”

And thus they’d reached stalemate. For now.

Not that Remus much cared because whilst he was still shredded on the inside he’d be spending his first Hanukkah without his son, he at least had a date-possible-shag to get him through.

Bringing Teddy to the train was easy enough, and Remus managed to keep it together as he got his son sorted. “Text me as soon as you get there. And please be good for him.”

Rolling his eyes, the teen slung one arm round Remus’ shoulders. “I will miss you, you know. I just…I feel bad for him.”

Remus froze. “What?”

“Well he’s not really got anyone, has he? I mean so I won’t be here for the week. I still get to come home to you, don’t I?”

Remus felt his throat go a little tight. “You’re a good kid, Teddy. You know that?”

“I had some idea.” Teddy reached up, ruffling his freshly dyed green locks and shrugged. “Just don’t be too bored without me. Have fun on your date.”

Remus blushed a little, having had made an attempt to hide it from his son, but Teddy was a snoop and had gone into Remus’ texts. He spent most of the week taking the piss, but mostly was excited for his dad. 

“Don’t open your presents early,” Remus warned as the train came into the station. “I’ll ask Gil and I know he’ll tell me the truth.”

“Not if I bribe him with chocolate,” Teddy said with a snicker. “But I won’t. I’ll be good. So long as the iPod’s really in one of those parcels.”

“You’ll just have to wait.” Remus hugged his son once more, then stood back as he drifted up onto the car and was gone. He caught a brief glimpse of green hair in the window as the train left, and then Remus turned on his heel and went back to his.

*** 

Sirius texted up to the moment Remus stepped into the pub. It was his local, Remus following the explicit directions Sirius gave him, and it was more crowded than he preferred. But it seemed like a good crowd, and he found Sirius jealously guarding a small table near the bar.

Remus laughed as he slid into the seat, taking the offered pint Sirius ordered just before he arrived. “Thanks. This is perfect.”

Sirius grinned widely. “How’d the send-off go? Did you cry?”

Remus snorted into his drink. “No, thank you very much. I’ve learnt to control myself over the years. Instead I wallowed and had tea and watched a really sad documentary about shark finning.”

“Without crying?” Sirius asked, and his eyes went wide when Remus nodded. “That’s hard core punk rock.”

Remus laughed again as he finished off the pint, and Sirius was quick to fetch another. Then, after ten minutes, another.

“Getting completely pissed is not a good idea,” Remus said after sipping on his third.

“Why not?” Sirius demanded. “Isn’t that the point? Drowning your sorrows in the sweet nectar of the gods.”

“Wasn’t that honeyed wine or something?” Remus mused, grinning a bit from the slight buzz. 

“You’re a fucking nerd, Remus,” Sirius said, moving his chair a bit closer.

Remus smiled at him. “I am. I am a bloody hopeless nerd. Also I don’t want to get too pissed because I tend to make very bad choices when I am, and I rather like you. I’d like this date to go well. If erm… that’s what it is?”

“You worry too much,” Sirius said, but allowed himself to slow down as well. “And yes, it’s a date.”

Remus breathed a sigh of relief. “Good.”

“In fact, I hoped to ask you round mine because well, I rather fancy a snog and it’s not as much fun with a bunch of annoying heteros watching the match.”

Remus almost choked on his swallow of beer, and swiped his hand across his mouth. “Christ. Erm. Well you’re not wrong about the heteros making it less fun. But I didn’t expect…” He stopped though, because he had expected. At least a little. And he’d wanted it. “Yeah alright. Shall we make this our last?”

Sirius was not adverse to the idea. He paid up their tab, and after finishing off their third pint, headed out. “I drove my bike here,” Sirius said, nodding to a rather impressive looking motorbike with shiny chrome, “but I live walking distance.”

“Might clear our heads a bit,” Remus agreed. It was frigid outside, but when Sirius grabbed his hand and twinned their fingers together, Remus’ entire body went hot.

He glanced down at their hands, the heat radiating from palm to palm, and he felt a sudden, profound loneliness. Maybe it was just the holiday and being alone. Or maybe it was the pressing knowledge that Gil had known it was over for a long time, and yet had continued to waste Remus’ time on a relationship that was never meant to work. Whatever it was, Remus felt both the craving to take things further, and the desire to stop before it hurt more.

Unfortunately Sirius had been right, he did live just round the corner and suddenly they were stood outside the doors. Sirius stopped when Remus hesitated, and he turned to the curly-haired man. “Alright?”

Remus bit down on his bottom lip. “Not sure if I should come up.”

Sirius looked put out for a second, dropping Remus’ hand, but his expression was more concerned than anything. “Have I done something?”

Shaking his head, Remus took a breath. “I fancy you. I mean obviously you’re good looking, and you’re funny and clever. But I don’t know if can take some one-off right now. Don’t’ get me wrong, getting off with someone as gorgeous as you are would definitely be on my list of things to-do, but I haven’t been casual in a while and…”

“Oh.” Sirius took a step toward Remus. “Did I give you that impression?”

Remus blinked. “Er?”

“I’m not interested in…” Sirius stopped and sighed. “I’m not comfortable with one-offs. I do know I’m good looking, and it tends to lead to a lot of shallow relationships, but I’m not interested in that. I know we don’t really know each other well but I was hoping for a bit more than just…just fucking. Is that what you expected?”

Remus felt horribly embarrassed, covering his face with his hands. “I just assumed. Because you know…you’re you and I’m me and…”

“Self-deprecation doesn’t suit you, Remus. It’s probably your shitty ex’s fault, but you should be aware of how completely gorgeous and clever _you_ are. I’d been watching you for weeks trying to pluck up the courage to say hi.”

Remus looked up in surprise. “Honestly?”

Sirius chuckled. “Absolutely. I was hoping for a snog, and maybe a cuppa and a cuddle on my sofa. Nothing more. No pressure. I know you’re still dealing with the fall out of a relationship ending.”

Remus became profoundly aware of just how _cold_ it was standing there, so he nodded for Sirius to get the door open. Before long, they were stepping into his flat, Remus appreciative the place was already warmed up.

“Let me start the kettle, yeah? Just make yourself at home.”

The flat was very Sirius. The décor a bit haphazard with nothing matching at all, and the art looked like it was either worth one pound, or a million. He had several bookshelves, two dedicated to books, and the rest to vinyl which sandwiched a rather old looking, yet pristine turntable. 

The sofa material looked like it was made out of a towel, and when Remus ran his hand along it, he was amazed at how soft it was.

“You like that?” Sirius asked as he walked back into the lounge holding two cups of tea. “I forced Jamie to give it to me. Lily agreed only because it meant she could go sofa shopping.”

Remus chuckled as he eased himself down onto a cushion and took the tea from the baker. “Thanks.”

“Sorry for my lack of milk or sugar. I’ve been at the café for so sodding long the past month, I haven’t been to the shop in…well, I don’t remember.”

Remus shook his head with a smile. “Honestly it’s fine. Probably better this way.” He took a sip, trying not to grimace at the bitter taste, and smiled when he saw Sirius doing the same.

“So,” Sirius began, and the mood was decidedly awkward, mostly due to Remus’ sudden freak-out downstairs. “Feeling better?”

Remus used the tea to give his nervous hands something to do, and he rolled the mug between his fingers. “A little. I feel pretty mortified about what happened downstairs. I just…this is all so new for me, you know?”

“Ten years is a long time to be with someone,” Sirius replied with a nod. “You should stop worrying so much though. You’re alright, Remus.”

Flushing a bit, he shifted forward and put his mug down, grinning inwardly when Sirius did the same. When Remus sat back up, he noticed that there was almost no space between them, and Sirius hand was reaching for his thigh. “Can I ask what you want to happen? I mean, apart from cuddles, tea, and snogging?”

Sirius’ grin was less playful now, his fingers trailing a line up and down the top of Remus’ thigh. “I’d like to take you on a proper date. Several, I think. I can’t predict things will work out, but I have a good feeling about this.”

“After knowing me so little?” Remus challenged, but he couldn’t ignore the feeling in his gut either. There was just something about Sirius.

“I think when you know it’s going to work out, you just know.”

Remus licked his lips as he shifted even closer. Somehow their legs tangled up a bit, in spite of Remus’ being much longer than Sirius’. And there was a hand round his back, drawing lazy lines up and down his spine. And another hand cupping his shoulder, right up against his neck. Remus found his own hands fisting in the front of Sirius’ jumper like he was afraid Sirius would disappear suddenly.

“It wasn’t like that with Gil. We had…it was a rocky beginning. I learnt he was cheating on his wife with me, but he left her shortly after. The divorce was messy and we kept splitting up, but then he’d come back and we’d try it again. It was tough on me. Teddy was so young and…” Remus trailed off, his voice tense with the memories. “But we just fell together. Habit, mostly. He was the one who told me we weren’t in love and I fought him on it, but he was right. I’m not sure I ever was.”

Sirius’ long, slender fingers drew along the cut of Remus’ jaw, gentle and patient. “It’s never perfect. It’s not like you read in books or see in some film where there’s some big explosion. James and Lily were a mess when they first met each other. Hate at first sight. But it took them a while to realise when you hate someone, it’s because you feel for them. The opposite of love is apathy, and there was never any of that with them.”

Remus smiled, shifting so close he and Sirius’ faces were inches apart. “You’re very profound sometimes.”

“Only sometimes?” Sirius challenged with a small grin. His tongue darted out to wet his lips. “May I?”

“Kiss me?” Remus asked, then nodded almost frantically. “God yes. Please.”

Sirius closed the distance between them, their tongues sliding hotly together, hands grabbing and pulling and holding so tight. Remus’ head was spinning with it all, and he wondered in that moment if maybe Sirius was wrong. Maybe there was an explosion.

***  
**Epilogue**

“…and you text me the moment you get back in,” Remus cautioned. “I’m not joking.”

Rolling his eyes, Teddy reached for the door. “Yeah dad, I get it. I’m going on a date though. I’m not going to like, start an underground revolution.”

“You know most of those start by accident,” Sirius piped up from his spot on the sofa next to Remus. “I’m just saying, it’s best to be aware.”

“You’re both ridiculous,” Teddy groused, but he was grinning. “Anyway you two have a good night in. Don’t wait up.”

He shut the door before Sirius or Remus could make some horribly inappropriate, and mortifying comment.

Turning to his lover, Remus grinned. “Alone at last.”

“Mm, whatever shall we do?” Sirius asked, his fingers ghosting up the front of Remus’ jumper. “I mean, I don’t want to waste all my good moves. Our anniversary is coming up next week.”

“Ah yes. No spoilers.”

“Indeed,” and Sirius occupied his mouth with the skin on Remus’ neck, sucking lightly at his pulse-point. “But I think maybe a short preview?”

Remus gasped a little, arching into Sirius’ hands and he grinned. “You know I love you, right? More than almost anything.”

“Except chocolate tarts.”

“Well only yours,” Remus said, turning his head to slide his tongue into Sirius’ mouth for a moment. He pulled away and smiled. “But those are an extension of you, so I don’t think it counts.”

Sirius chuckled as he pressed himself down on top of Remus’ their entire bodies slotting together like puzzle pieces. Sirius breathed right against Remus’ mouth, his lips moving with a kiss as he spoke. “I love you just as much, you know?”

“I know,” Remus said softly. “And you were wrong. There were explosions.”

Sirius laughed. “Oh love, I always knew that. Just like you always knew I was the worst liar.”


End file.
